I really enjoyed the chance I had to share my post with my roommate. My personal narrative is about a very difficult time in my life and a very good friend that I lost. While reading through my narrative I didn't really look up. I had my eyes glued to the screen because I was kind of afraid to see the reaction. At the end of my post I did look up to see tears in her eyes. That was a moment when I knew that my personal narrative had improved and is starting to become what I want it to be.
I want my narrative to make a connection with the reader, so that they really feel Jared's light and inspiration. I definitely still have some work to do with it, but I received some good feedback that it's on the right path. I will be working on emphasizing the smaller details of his story to make a stronger connection and message as I move forward.
After I read my post to my roommate she commented to me "I don't know what I would do if that happened to me..." We got into a deeper conversation about that. I shared more of my feelings at the time of his death and we talked about other things in our lives that have been difficult. We talked about the death of younger people and what a shock it can be. Lives are to be cherished because they are so unpredictable. We have to appreciate every moment we have with those around us.