Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Fire In Her Eyes

Every stake has one. I would go even further to say that every ward has one. Every ward in Mormon culture has a Rouge Mormon. Typically I've found that they are a feisty, old woman, who has fire in her eyes. She believes the church is true, but doesn't mind using the occasional swear word or innuendo. In my ward this Rouge Mormon was in the form of a fiery red headed, 60 year old woman. She was the kind of person that would walk up to women in the ward and tell them that she hated their blouse (necklace, earrings, whatever she fancied that week) and that she would be happy to take it off their hands for them.

This woman had a special affinity for my Dad. It started because they were fans of rival football teams, The San Francisco 49ers and The Dallas Cowboys. She was the type of woman that came to Sacrament Meeting, only to leave directly afterward because it was football season and "her boys" were playing. Why she loved The Cowboys so much, no one knew.

There were countless times that she would come up to my Dad at church after a big 49er win and smack talk him a little bit about it. She would then go on to say that he needed to be the next Bishop of the ward. Shortly following that she would push her glasses up on her nose, even though they hadn't fallen away from her eyes, always using her middle finger, and smirking at my Dad. She would then walk away, hands flailing at her sides, on to the next victim. I don't think I ever saw her push up her glasses in that way to anyone else, although I'm sure she did.


  1. I had a branch president on my mission who would talk about Alabama Football from the pulpit. I think that the church was his second religion, after the crimson tide. To him, saying "War Eagle" (A sort of cheer that Auburn fans use) was akin to denying the Holy Ghost. Sometimes I think the people watching can be the best part about being at church!

  2. Sport rivalries are always the best to observe within the church setting. The obvious one being BYU v. Utah. One hand its all in good fun, but on the other hand it can overstep its bounds, especially in the church setting. But sports is way we can bond with each other whether were on the same team or not.